I’m sure you’ve had a rough day, a rough week, a rough year. Life is tough, there’s no doubt about it. There are subtle moments that can make a day beautiful, then there are moments where people try and rain on your parade. These people, they try and harsh your mellow.
THESE PEOPLE. They say untrue things about you, they lie to you, they make you feel sad or angry. These people, the world revolves around them. These people that you think are your friends, well, think again.
What’s a friend? A friend is someone who make you smile. A friend is someone who lifts you up, not down. A friend is someone that actually cares about your well-being.
It’s hard to come by people that are genuine and actually care about you and want to help you and lift your spirits. It’s hard to come by people who talk about meaningful things.
I’ve come by a very few people like that. They hold a special place in my heart because they’ve made me feel so powerful inside. They’ve made my insides feel super light and giddy. That’s hard to come by. But when it does come, it’s an amazing feeling to know that there are people who FEEL exactly the same as I do. There are people who just like understand. It’s like we’re on the same wavelength. We’re riding the same wave.
Powerful, isn’t it?
When we connect with others, it’s so powerful, especially if it’s a TRUE CONNECTION. Like, you’ll know it’s true because you’ll feel it inside you.
Although, there will be people that truly test your patience and they test your boundaries. Sometimes, I feel this anger inside of me that wants to just blow up and yell and really just tell someone off.
Then, I think.
I think about all the consequences of that one outburst and what it can do to myself. It can hurt myself, but mostly, it can hurt others. I don’t like hurting people. But I do agree that people need to know when they mess up and when they’re out of place. But the most crazy thing is people will push you. There are always going to be people that start drama and try and bring you down and make you feel terrible. They want to win by doing that. It’s pure evil. It’s unfortunate to see people like this. It’s sad. It’s heartbreaking actually. But I’ve noticed that how one reacts to this kind of pressure will show everything about a person.
What I mean is, I can react to negative behavior in a negative way and then end up with negative consequences. So, I don’t want to do that because I don’t want negative consequences, even though it might feel right to act in a negative way.
I can do what’s called the “kill them with kindness” technique. That isn’t easy because you’re taking a negative situation and reacting to it in a positive way. You’re not engaging in any conflict, but you are provoking the situation by reacting to it.
Okay, so here’s the most challenging method that I am currently in the process of learning, and that is:
“Take yourself out of the situation.”
I met a man once, a really nice soul, inside and out, and he told me the minute someone disrespects him, he turns the other way. He completely doesn’t even respond to this kind of disrespectful behavior. Now that’s hard. So, that’s a challenge that I am trying to learn.
When someone disrespect you, you disengage. You leave. You get out. You DON’T respond. You ignore. THAT is a challenge because every single cell in your body wants to respond to defend the self. At least, for me, that’s what I want to do. It’s the fight or flight reaction, and I certainly don’t mind putting up a fight, as long as I believe it’s right. BUT…
I am learning that life is hard and you have to pick and choose your battles wisely.
So for example, when you’re dealing with someone who is immature and says things about you that are untrue and tries to constantly bring you down. Ignore em’. Get rid of em’. When you notice that someone is causing you more pain than more joy. Bye-Bye!
Life is too short to be around being who are always constantly starting a fight, making up stories, and literally making you feel pain in the pit of your stomach. Sometimes, people will let you down, that’s life and that’s part of being a human. We all make mistakes, but when people constantly let you down ALL THE TIME then, you know that it’s time to go.
Departing is never easy but it is necessary at the opportune moment. You’ll know exactly when that moment is because your heart will tell you.
So, learn how to take yourself out of the equation by departing when there is a conflict that you know confrontation just wont work.